The Blog

Life can be inspiring and fulfilling, we don’t have to settle for okay!

The nature of coaching is such that it is often difficult to explain to a client upfront how they might feel at the end of a coaching journey. I have personally been on various coaching journeys for the last four years or so and I have worked with many different coaches, teachers and facilitators. For each one, I always thought I knew what I wanted to get out of the coaching experience and somehow I always end up with so much more. 

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” Carl Jung 

What is coaching?

As an ICF-International Coach Federation Accredited Coach, I ascribe to the ICF definition of coaching. This is to partner with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximise their personal and professional potential.

For me coaching is about empowering individuals through one-on-one or group coaching conversations where they feel supported, and where the process leads to sustainable change to their behaviour and their way of thinking. 

Don’t settle for feeling “okay”

When clients find the idea of how coaching might help them too difficult to grasp, I tell them my chiropractor story. 

A few years ago my husband started going to a chiropractor for his back. For as long as I’ve known him, he’s had issues with his back and I was so happy when he decided to get professional help, instead of all the quick fixes that didn’t really help him much over the years. This particular chiropractor ran monthly workshops and information sessions and I decided to join my husband for one of these. I was completely intrigued by the talk, so after the talk I signed up for a free session and I bought the book. The free session required me to have x-rays done and then to meet with the doctor. 

When I met with him a few weeks later, he asked me a range of questions about my health, my family and lifestyle. He then asked me what was probably the most important question. He asked, “How are you feeling in general from a health and energy perspective?” My response was, “I’m okay.” 

By okay I meant I was “healthy”. Maybe a little overweight, stressed and I could be more active and work less, but I was okay. Then he asked me what we in coaching call “a powerful coaching question”: “Do you only want to feel okay?”. 

At first I didn’t know what to say to this. I mean, I was grateful that I never really got sick except for minor colds and flu and a tension headache here and there. I said, “Well, sure. I guess, yes…?”. I mean who doesn’t want to feel better than okay? 

He then says well let me show you something. So, off we go, he gives me a few instructions and he begins to shift, pull, push at different parts of my body, which in the moment felt really uncomfortable (as with coaching) but I felt safe and supported throughout the very short session. 

When he was done, he asked, “How do you feel?” 

And I felt FANTASTIC! I was like “I feel taller! OMG! Am I taller?” It felt amazing! As though I could conquer the world. 

That’s what my coaching journeys have felt like, minus the pulling at different body parts of course. I have always felt more aware, clearer, more empowered and more motivated after my coaching sessions. 

Let me help you 

If you want to be more intentional about your life, whether it is a new leadership role, a change in your career or just finding your life’s passion again, I can support you to get there. This journey can help you get to a space that feels expansive, where you feel as though the impossible is possible, a space that feels aligned to what you want for your life. I can offer guidance and support on your journey to feeling more than just “okay”.  

You can access my coaching options on my website to schedule a transition strategy call or a 30-minute consultation to see if we could work together. You can also join our community to get updates and information about the work I do. 

About the author

Selina is an ICF-accredited coach based in Cape Town, South Africa. She is the founder of SelinaNewman Coaching. A coaching practice designed to help professionals turn what often feel like impossible life and career transitions into powerful opportunities for growth.


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